Seeing through my eyelids... Part 1

So today my co-worker gave me some advice he proclaims quite often,

“Never get married!”
He says this because, for whatever reason, he is constantly wrapped up in phone battles with his wife. Instead of just laughing at his marital anguish, I asked him, “Why not?”
He said, after some contemplation, “You just never truly see the person until you open your eyes, and sometimes that’s too late.” Now, I know he loves his wife and kids very much, and he said that out of pure frustration, but it did get me to thinking….

If I really opened my eyes to the men I date, what would I see?

Now, in hindsight, I can see what clear losers they have been. Not all in terrible “watch me bash my ex’s” ways, but losers non-the-less. This one had no ambition, that one constantly referred to himself as White Trash, this one thought the pun “camel-toe casino” (instead of camel rock casino) was the most ingenious thing he ever said.

Granted it was these things that made me finally dump the losers, but what about those few months I wasted my time and thought I was in heaven?? The, now embarrassing, times I thought "could this be the one?"

Well, I think I may be over self-inflicted humiliation! …at least this form… my pants getting caught in my car door will probably happen again whether I want it to or not….

Debi always tells me “You never know a person until they show you who they are.” Which is true - to an extent. I mean, I’m sure neither she nor my father were always perfect to one another. Everyone makes mistakes and cant be a great person all the time. Hell, I am not a great person all the time (quit nodding your head in agreement)!

So what should I look for in a man whom I am just starting to date? What are the GOOD traits (I know, speaking the same language, or at least understand each others, MIGHT be a plus - thanks…)?

More to come....what are your thoughts?

Soapbox for Two, Justice for One

I have had a rather trying week at work; Trying my patience, my confidence, my humility, and my willpower. I have wanted to give up on my morals, throw in the towel and walk out. I have cried more times than I’d like to admit (and in front of people I have no choice but to see again). But tonight, as the rain falls heavy on my window and feeds the ground below, so too does it cleanse my feelings of doubt, my questions of sanity, and my bruised temperament.

I am proud of myself; In this haunting month of October, I stood up to a monster. I looked her in the eye, and said “No more.” She simply rolled those slimey eyes, cackled, and trotted away - seemingly unharmed….But for just one instant, I saw the beasts' tail between her legs…and she wimpered… for JUST ONE MOMENT.

For that I am proud.

"Justice consists not in being neutral between right and wrong, but in finding out the right and upholding it, wherever found, against the wrong." Theodore Roosevelt

Business in the front - Party in the back

No - I’m not going to write about some funky new sex position (sorry to say the “S” word, dad), I was referring to hairstyles. I was talking to a great friend of mine today and decided I finally had warn him about my new hair color as I will be visiting Denver this up-coming weekend.

A few weeks ago, I went to get a new hair color - Copper/Red with Blonde highlights. Well, as I am known to do, I researched and researched where in NM to have it done. Rules? Had to be an Aveda Salon, had to be located in a hip area, and had to come with top-notch references (and some people say I have too high of expectations. No, really - they do…). After weeks of searching I found the crowned jewel, award winning and all! Let me beat you to the punch-line - Crowned jewel of crap!

There was this young girl, we’ll call her Snatchafrass, who looked like she just stepped out of the 80’s but probably hadn’t even been born in the decade she so proudly represented (“Regan, who? Wasn’t he on Laguna Beach?”).

I digress - So she underestimated how much red she needed to make (twice), and consequently thrust three different colors of red upon my cringing scalp. The bottom two weren’t that bad they kinda clicked and looked “radical“. Now the roots - well, lets just say our “tubular” Snacherella created a Bozo the Clown stunt double. I “totally freaked!” The real “heinous” thing about it? Even after I complained she said to me “That’s going to be $145.” “AS IF!”

I didn’t pay her. And the Bozo color, like the clown himself, has faded into obscurity.

Wow, for some completely unknown and unrelated reason, I have an unbearable desire to watch Bill & Ted….and use words with the letter “U”….

:) Sweet dreams
-H

God is Single

Since moving to New Mexico, I constantly get asked one question over and over - and over. No, its not “Red or Green?” Instead I’m asked, “Why aren’t you married?” I seriously get asked this at least once a day (It doesn’t help that I work with about 2000 people ).

The answer I used to give is “I’m just not ready yet” however, that never seems to satisfy their salivating minds…So instead of just walking away as they turn their heads to a 45 degree angle like a confused puppy, I have started to get creative. Blame it on habit.

Here are some of my favorites when asked:

• Just lucky, I guess.
• Because I just love hearing this question.
• Marriage is easy - 2 million people do it every year - I mean hell, every three minutes a marriage takes place in Las Vegas (don’t forget I work at a Casino)…ask me why I don’t do something hard - like become a Neurosurgeon!
• Well, I think it would take all the spontaneity out of dating.
• Why aren’t you thin?
• I’m married to my career, although recently we’ve been considering a trial separation.

Now - I didn’t make all these up on my own (I do still have SOME single friends…) nor do I feel I am the first person to give these replies. We also decided to google a few - if you EVER have some self-humiliating spare time, try it out.

The really funny part? When I typed “what to say when asked “why aren’t you married?” it gave me “Did you mean: What to say when asked “Why ARE you married?” hehehe. True story. The best one I found online was a great one for my younger sister -

• Because having a child and a spouse would be redundant.

I’m not saying I would use these come-backs when my Grandmother asks the age-old question - but for everyone else, it has at the very least made them laugh (or they think to themselves, “its remarks like THAT why she is not married…”).

BTW - It’s green.